WELLLL I guess I'll have to then, WON'T I?

Imagine someone calling your mother or daughter a 'c*#t' and
feel that boiling blood within you.
Try imagining watching someone speak the way you do to me,
and observe if what you feel is disgust.

Everyday you get a little more rude.
With your snide remarks and your immaturity.
What I find most repulsive of all, is that arrogance and inability to see your faults and mistakes.
And repeating them, over and over again, sometimes with sickening glee and even pride....
making it all the more off-putting.

If you don't want to stop yourself from being this way,
who's to even try and help you?
If you get SUCH a kick out of power and being so oblivious to empathy and compassion,
are you even capable of being saved?

Do you even realize that ALL this energy, the one you are blowing when you lose your head,
the energy you are draining out of the people around you, the energy it takes to make you understand...
could easily but put into so many more productive and powerful things.
Your Merry Go Round of a life is kicking you in a pattern so stagnant in personal growth
but you are arrogantly unaware.

"Digging yourself deeper in your own shit" has new meaning with you.

Someone needs to wake you up.
Because you definitely are too fast asleep to wake up yourself.
I know talking to you hardly works.
Or maybe it's because it's been me that has been the most honest and frank with you
so now whatever comes out my mouth MUST be bullshit since I called you out on all yours.

There is this monster and I'm not sure if it's in you, or coming out of you but it's there.
And if you don't recognize that and try and sort out your demons within
then nobody else can help you, even if they tried to.
SO good luck.
We all know you need it. And will need it.
When it all comes back to hit you.

If you think I'm a bitch, wait til you meet KARMA.

The Lovers

In the scope of our personal relationships this card stands for the great love that deeply touches and flows through us.
It has little to do with "failing in love," which Erich Fromm rightly says is at most an indication of our previous loneliness.
The card can indicate a new relationship or mean that our great happiness is to be found here and now in the partnership we already have.
The important decisive character of this card makes it apparent that we can only tap this source of fulfilling experience when we voluntarily "limit" ourselves and affirm from our hearts that we will follow this path with a certain person.
Each of us would certainly be prepared to take this step if we could just meet the Dream Woman or Prince Charming.
This card challenges us to stop deceiving ourselves and recognize that such mythical figures do not present themselves in completed form to us, but rather that they could be within our partner, hoping and waiting to be discovered.
The path that leads to another person is: the decision.

~ Tarot of Dreams

Images from the Tarot of Dreams® Deck, reproduced by permission of Ciro Marchetti,
http://www.ciromarchetti.com Copyright ©2006. Further reproduction prohibited.

The Rose

I figure I best describe what most women want in a man, she wants from the rose.

I love flowers. I love looking at them, running through fields of them.
Receiving them and caring for them.
But roses, well roses are special.
Especially those ever-stunning deep red ones.

Anyway back to what I want in a man, wait.... in a rose. Yes.

I don't want a dozen, or half for that matter.
Just one healthy perfect, long stemmed, thorn-free Looker.
I don't want one that's too clammed up as I love the process of watching one bloom,
and I want one which have a natural openness about it.
I promise to pamper you, Rose... water you, stare at you and sing to you...
just so you'll open up for me. Spread to all your glory.

Catching a glimpse of you in my living room makes me smile.
And I often want to color your petals with the redness of my lips.
When I breeze you across my face, I want you to smell sweet.
Of meadows and spring kisses.
Yet I acknowledge the complexity of your beauty and the delicacy of your being.

You don't often find a near perfect rose but you always remember it.
And same goes for that perfect man.

Tis the Season

And December rolls around once more.
Another year passed. This one, faster than the last.
Some of us are either worrying about Xmas presents, what to do over the holidays or winding down from the hectic year we all claim we had.
Some of us evaluate our 'gains and losses' while others are just glad the year is over so they may start 2011 afresh.
A self-made slave to man-made time lines instead of natural cycles or listening to the body.

Personally speaking, schedule is so erratic that public holidays often mean nothing to me.
And as much as I try to listen to the rhythms of life and follow the planets energetically,
every year end... I do what almost most people do.
Find yet another reason to Celebrate.

Ti's the season... is this seasons usual mantra... :)

So let's be jolly.
I know I'll get into some kind of festive spirit.
I'll buy a mistletoe to attach to my newly painted door frame,
maybe some sparkly Xmas balls :) to hang randomly around the living room.
I'll probably cave and buy some lights too... because they are multi-purposeful and I can use them for other 0ccasions. :)
Thus being eco-concious and 'celebratory'.

It's likely I will spend most of December trying to prepare for 2011
but I must remind myself to balance the work and play.
So I hope you spend this Dec doing something exciting and uplifting to close the year nicely.
Backstage, in catwalk terms or finale shows... we say "be sure to finish strong".

Happy Holidays.

Guilty?

During a recent conversation with one of my spiritual healers,
I learn that guilt has the lowest vibrations and thus attracts negativity.

We all feel guilty some time.
Whether it's that indulgent cupcake, or that lazy day at home,
we often feel we do not deserve to take a break, treat ourselves, and do nothing.

This rainy Sunday, I sit at home, running the weekend through my mind.
My mates are coming over to help me paint but I have a good mind to ditch the plan and just veg out instead.
Chat and spend some quality time with quality beings.

I step out on my balcony to find my neighbor and her husband out on theirs,
in the rain.... scrubbing it down.
Surprised.. I asked, "Hi, wow, how come you're cleaning it now, in the rain?"

Her first response was,
"Hey don't worry, I am not washing stuff (dirt, I think she meant) onto your side of the wall!"

We went about with some neighborly chit chat through a slit in our shared porch wall.
and I got back to my space.
But I couldn't help but ponder on her comment.

We feel guilt and the need to express it, even more than we catch ourselves doing it.
We apologize more times in a day then we probably should.
We seldom claim our right to celebrate or get about our business even in our own homes.

And by celebrating, I don't mean clubbing or drinking ourselves stupid or splurging cash.
I mean celebrating the fact that we have fresh water at our fingertips, and food in our fridges.
(Gosh, the fact that we even have fridges!)
Just be grateful and guilt-free for the next stroll you take in the park.
Or for that warm shower you enjoy, at the beginning and end of each day.
How precious and blessed we are, to have that so accessible to us, daily.

At your next meal, take a moment to appreciate how it was served to you.
No matter how it is delivered, release the guilt and celebrate the simplicity of consuming it.

Spend some time every day realizing the amazement of your individual life.
Then, without guilt, share some joy with the other amazing beings you hold close to you.

Let's naturally lift our vibrations so we attract more positivity n share positively.
Guilt-free.

www.awe50me.com

SUNDAY, MAY 16, 2010

CHARMAINE HARN - SINGAPORE

WHAT’S YOUR ATTITUDE TOWARDS THE WAY YOU CHOOSE TO LIVE?
We all have a purpose in life and that is reflected in our attitude towards work, the arts, relationships and ambition. I think the key is to make a life, not just a living.

Fulfillment plays a big part in MY purpose and is the driving force behind any project I chose to undertake. I want to master the art of doing less but achieving more. But discipline and patience is vital as well. And flow. Flowing is important. Understanding the cycles of life and knowing that challenges are opportunities for us to be creative.

SO HOW THE HELL DO YOU DO IT?
Prayer. And a lot of whisky. Jokes aside… it's all about Balance. Moderation. Doing everything as fairly and equally as you can. Some women call it yoga, others say Pilates, I say Balance. But according to your individual lifestyle.

Your life must complement itself. The people around you, the choices you make all must make you happy and help you be more aware.



TELL US ABOUT THE PEOPLE WHO INSPIRE YOU?
Well I love people. I can talk to anyone and will talk to everyone. My inspiration comes from the fact that everybody has a story. Their own story. That's why often, when I met someone of importance, I ask them a simple question - "What has been your secret to success?"

David Tang, founder of The China Club & Shanghai Tang told me, "The key is to being well read. Read. As much as you can. Build a library and always be willing to learn new things."

Maggie Q, Hollywood actress and close friend confides, "We are who we are, to inspire people and we must be proud of who we are and what we do."

Faith Roberts, my Mother and Guru says, "Always surround yourself with people who are pure and good to you and bring out the best in you."

WHAT WOULD YOU DO TO SHAKE UP YOUR GENERATION?
Add music. A lot of it. Good music. Educate through music. Inspire with sound therapy. Heal through sound vibrations.

TURN US ON TO SOMETHING?
I swear by Nature. I love holistic remedies. For many years, I have used flower essences and essential oils to stay balanced, focused and pampered. I am also fascinated with crystals and stones.

Bach Flower Remedies & Aurora Alchemy Goddess Oils



WHAT HAS BEEN MOST INFLUENTIAL TO YOU & YOUR GENERATION?
The iMAC revolution. The Imac, Iphone, Ipod. Everything is «i» this and «i» that, in more ways than just aesthestically.

HOW DID YOU GET INTO WHAT YOU'RE DOING NOW?
Wow, this question stunned me. It brought me back to the time I was 4 years old and in the Botanical Gardens with my parents. We were all seated together in a café and my Dad had left his SLR camera on the tabletop. When no one noticed, I grabbed the camera, went outside and photographed a red Carnation flower.

To this day, I still have the picture. It is probably,comparatively, the best shot I have ever taken. That same year, 1981.. I did a TV commercial for Yamaha. I was the Girl for the Portasound. The print shot was of me, seated cross-legged, hugging a portasound with a huge grin on my face. The tvc had me skip down the Yamaha corridor, clasping my portasound, straight up to the camera to say "I love PortaSound!" Those were my 1st experiences with (both in front of and behind) the camera.

TELL US ABOUT YOUR LATEST WORK?
My last hosting gig was for the 1st season of Supermodelme. A reality program where 10 wannabe models battled it out to emerge victorious and win $10gs. I hosted the program, acted as guest judge on various occasions, played 'Mentor' to the contestants and awarded the 1st SMM winner live on stage in Zouk at their finale event.

As for modeling, I only do so now by special request. Last weekend, I went to KL to walk the 'red carpet' at the Bonia event where Anita Sarawak performed and I did a 'celebrity catwalk' for Bonia's Italian designer, who was present at the event. Creatively, I love photography and writing. I am currently working on a piece for a friend's newly opened concept store called Word of Mouth in Bali. I write more about the people behind the idea, and add some playful touches of my own to it to make it relatable.

WHAT IS YOUR WEAPON OF CHOICE FOR YOUR PASSION?
Charm.

WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE PHOTOGRAPHER?
I have been following a photographer named Daniel Luxford whom I met in a skate shop in Perth. He sold us some skate wheels. His photography is raw and amazing. His 'personal' collection on his website are my favorites.



WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE FASHION DESIGNER?
Currently my favorite fashion designer is Sven for AllDressedUp.

DESCRIBE YOUR STYLE?
My personal style is about comfort and accesorizing. I love flowy materials and chunky jewelery. I think a woman should feel confident and sexy in her choice of clothes and know her own body well enough to wear flattering cuts, according to her moods. And I love jeans... I have them in all cuts, shades and lengths.

WHAT KIND OF MUSIC ARE YOU LISTENING TO NOW?
I like Funk, House and Reggae.

TELL US ABOUT THE SCENE IN YOUR CITY?
Singaporeans and everybody in Singapore are spoilt for choice when it comes to the Nightlife here. There is a scene for everyone, really. So don't expect New York styled lofty parties or hotel pent-house do's with pimped out luxuries (well you can imagine once in awhile, because it does happen occasionally). Our city scene is more intimate. The variety makes up for the lack of crowd and after hours are usually in cliques indoors.

WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE THINGS TO DO IN YOUR CITY?
Drive around. When you're done in the city, take the freeways to secluded parts of the island. Like Changi Coast, Labrador Park or even Punggol. Seek out the heartlands and explore. WALK my dog out to East Coast Park, The Botanical Gardens, Changi Village as well as out on the islands when we do Boat Trips.

EAT! Katong Laksa, Sin Hoi San, Whole Earth, cockles, stingray, chili crabs… slurp.
Skateboarding. The skate park in East Coast is AWESOME> really. But I like long boarding more down slopes and gradual hills. Go to Fort Canning's concerts & festivals. The atmosphere there is incomparable. Spend a day in the week at the beach on Sentosa ; or charter a boat for the weekend to have a bbq on one of the the surrounding islands.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO TO SHAKE UP THE SCENE?
Organise a music festival with the 'Greats of Music today' and educate the people. Like a Music conference, with galleries and info on artists in the day and 'music appreciation' parties for the nights.

YOUR 3 FAV PLACES TO EAT IN YOUR CITY?
15 mins cafe, LaSalle / Whole Earth, Peak Seah St / Aoki Jap restaurant, Shaw Center

YOUR 3 FAV PLACES TO DRINK IN YOUR CITY?
BluJaz, Haji Lane / White Rabbit, Tanglin Village (I love those mini-Marys!)/ Orihara Shouten sake bar, Unity St.

YOUR 3 FAV PLACES TO SHOP IN YOUR CITY?
Haji Lane, Arab Street / Mandarin Gallery / Ann Siang Hill / Chinatown

YOUR 3 FAV PLACES TO HANGOUT IN YOUR CITY?
Charlie's corner, Changi Village / The Botanical Gardens / Raffles Marina, Tuas

CONTACT ARTISTS: AWE5OME

वैशाख

I have been feeling down. So down. Uncontrollably down.
And I have been hard on myself. I have been so hard on myself along with the ones I love and...
It's horrible. I feel horrible.
And for almost 2 weeks now, although I have done many exciting things and been totally inspired in little ways, I still feel bleak. Empty. Drained. Depressed.
Yes. And I am cautious about using that word, because it really is such a 'depressing' word.
But today... I saw a bit of light.
Or maybe I should say... a reason.
I know myself well enough to know that all I have been feeling, all that gunk that is surfacing now is doing so for a reason. Some internal clock. Cosmic forces.
Then I remember Vesak Day. Which is approaching and all becomes clear.
It's the Moon. Ending of a cycle. Purging of negative patterns and nasty habits.

On Vesākha Day, Buddhists all over the world commemorate events of significance to Buddhists of all traditions: The birth, enlightenment and the passing away of Gautama Buddha.

http://www.buddhanet.net/vesak.htm

Paying homage to the Buddha

Tradition ascribes to the Buddha himself instruction on how to pay him homage. Just before he died, he saw his faithful attendant Ananda, weeping. The Buddha advised him not to weep, but to understand the universal law that all compounded things (including even his own body) must disintegrate. He advised everyone not to cry over the disintegration of the physical body but to regard his teachings (The Dhamma) as their teacher from then on, because only the Dhamma truth is eternal and not subject to the law of change. He also stressed that the way to pay homage to him was not merely by offering flowers, incense, and lights, but by truly and sincerely striving to follow his teachings. This is how devotees are expected to celebrate Vesak: to use the opportunity to reiterate their determination to lead noble lives, to develop their minds, to practise loving-kindness and to bring peace and harmony to humanity.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ves%C4%81kha

I really hope this helps at least one of u. I have been hearing of many people feeling unhappy lately... and I want you to know it's part of the cycle.
We are part of the cycle. Of the whole.
What we feel, and say, and do and not do... affects it all.

Prepare yourself for Vesak Day! :) 28th May 2010 Full Moon. Go outside and have a moment.

Namaste All.